“Aunt ‘Neen….dressed up….as a clown?”. Ahh… the moments we keep in memory…
One of my clown characters had served at a party nearby, and I grabbed the opportunity afterward to visit with my friends, their first daughter being between 3 and 5 years old. JJ, the silent clown, was at her first birthday, and was the only costumed character she would get near (take that! Santa!). It must have been because she saw every stage of my transformation, buzzing in & out of the bathroom every few minutes to see what this person was up to. On this day, a few years later, things were a bit different.
Standing on the porch, I could hear her jumping up & down in the family room, asking “Daddy, who’s at the door? Who’s here??” “Go see”, he replied, but she stayed back, so I called her name: “Hello Miss…” That was all it took, “It’s Aunt ‘Neen!”, and with that, her little feet kicked into high gear and I could hear the quick pitter-pat as she ran down the hall toward the sound of my voice. Sight was another matter entirely, as she came to a screeching halt in view of the door and tried to match what she knew to be true with the stranger standing on her front porch. “Aunt ‘Neen….dressed up….as a clown?”. “Yes, baby, it’s me.” It wasn’t until I had taken off my hat & wig (and put it on Daddy’s head) that she was ready for hugs and the normal play of good friends.
There’s a protocol for real clowns – a big part of which is that once assembled as the clown, the human person isn’t to be found. It’s a little harder for a human with a clown’s heart to keep the clown character suppressed at all times, but the clown is the clown and the human is the human and they are to remain separate in the eyes of their audiences. If you don’t keep that straight, you lose the magic not only for your own character, but for clowns everywhere. We find interesting ways to explain how the human who seems so much like us is off on an errand in Tahiti or something, because it’s important to maintain consistency.
I’ve given thought to that day, and my niece’s assertion that I was dressed up as a clown, as one might dress up for masquerade balls or beggar’s night in the Fall. There are those, and the differences are easy for real clowns to spot. They tend to go with the classic easily purchased rainbow wig & pajama outfit, big floppy shoes, red ball nose, rather garish makeup, and they overplay the silliness because they are just in a short term role. It’s dress-up, for a little while, with full intent to return to normal when the event is over. As I muse over the difference, I note that Christians also come in two varieties… the real ones, and those who are dressed up as Christians.
Does your grace to forgive disappear on Monday morning? What about your love for strangers? Your reverence for God and all that pertains to Him? Your appreciation for worship and scripture? Are these consistent with you when it’s not Sunday, or the audience changes? Just like real clowns, real Christians with the heart of Christ find it impossible to suppress Him. Just like clowns, the inconsistency of one identified Christian can lose the testimony not only for that one, but for Christians everywhere. Just like dress-up clowns, dress-up Christians tend to go with the easily acquired outer symbols and overplay the restrictions, at times to the point of being garish or obnoxious…with full intent to return to normal when the event is over.
Jesus, being very real, was welcome in the company of sinners and they gladly listened to Him. Peter, Stephen, Paul, Philip…the list goes on, of real Christians who reached out to real sinners with a gracious character and a saving gospel.
Sometimes I need to check myself, and determine whether I’m real or just dressed up.
Good question to ask ourselves… are we being real or just dressing up…?
That is a VERY good point. I have often thought of that myself when I’m at work. Not as a clown but as an interpreter. How to balance on that fine tight-rope of being a christian and being an interpreter often have conflicting roles. Especially in the environment, the people group we so often work in. But to not let that bleed into my daily life and influence who I want to be and who I feel God wants me to be. Some days at work I get tired of being “dressed up” I want to go home and let my hair down and be me but in this profession that isn’t possible. I am not allowed to be me and there are days when I have interpreted for so many people and other situations which I would never naturally find myself that I start taking on the persona of someone else…. starts to make me question who I am that I can interpret that or make sense out of it. and I have to remind myself that God put me here for a reason to do the job that I”m doing. Maybe not each individual conversation but some are obviously bumped to me from God because they come on the days I am most discouraged and lead me to tears just thinking of them. But without the exposure and experience that God allows me to have I would never be able to be a part of the things God is leading me into (though I don’t often go willingly)
On a whole other tangent- we need to make sure that when we are “wearing” our spiritual clothes even we need to make sure we aren’t settling for hand-me-downs. God doesn’t intend for us to go through life that way. He gives even the birds of the air and the beasts of the field the best of everything and HE wants to give us even more than they have. So don’t settle. Expect the best. Sometimes God is only waiting for us to ask.