It is said that great comedy is often born of great pain.  Examples are cited, such as Jackie Gleason and Carol Burnett, Jonathan Winters, Jim Carrey, and yes, Robin Williams. One thing is certain, evidence abounds that fame and fortune do not generate peace and happiness. Highly successful musicians, poets, actors, and even comedians have been induced to give up their lives, not for some great honor, but for a respite from a dark relentless misery. As some have said, a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

If only… if only he could have revisited some of his filmed moments – the ones we remember when his characters bade us challenge the status quo, inspired us to move beyond the tough moments, or (bangarang) invited us to play. Clearly, since he memorized those speeches, delivered them flawlessly, and was often reminded of them in fan mail and interviews, the high ideals are not high enough, nor the lofty speeches buoyant enough, to rise above an inner monologue of unhealthy alignment.  In the lonely quiet, some people visit fantasies of nature or relive moments of joy with family and friends – others beg for such thoughts to pull them away from a litany of ugliness and accusation.

If only he could have interrupted himself with some of those seemingly endless strings of one line jokes and satirical commentaries that never failed to amaze us, rivaling Danny Kaye’s tongue twisters.  The man had skills, without a doubt.  Many have lamented over the irony that one who could bring such laughter and insight could reach a place where not a snicker, not a glimmer, could be found to pull him back from the edge of the cliff.

There will be those, and I know some of them, who will speak of how selfish people must be to choose a fatal option.  In a sense, when you consider the loss, agony, and guilt that living loved ones must cope with, “selfish” seems accurate.  In some instances, it might be true – but, and here’s the important part – not always.  Many accounts, including my own, tell of the overriding idea being one of sacrifice, to remove the burden of yourself from the shoulders of those you love.

What was Robin going through?  I don’t know.  None of us really can.  Whatever it was, however long it lasted, something convinced him that the light would never shine again, and then it didn’t.

There is an enemy, an accuser, a destroyer, who roams about in search of those he might devour.  Some, in an instant; others, bite by bite…day by day…word by word.  Nothing of earth can withstand him – not fame, wealth, applause, or even laughter.   He stalks his prey, hiding in the shadows of everyday activities, waiting patiently for an undefended moment to move in for the kill.  Too often, he succeeds.

There is a Protector, an advocate, the source of life, who also watches, in search of those He might rescue.  Some, in an instant; others by patient wooing…day by day…word by word.  Nothing in, above, or below the earth can withstand Him, not even the accuser.  Nothing but human will and His honor.  He has bound Himself by a gentleman’s code to not interfere where He has not been invited.  He walks alongside us in everyday activities, waiting patiently for an unoccupied moment to whisper grace.  Too often, He goes unheard.

We are their representatives, who at various times may join in the chorus of either side.  Accusing, defending, pummeling, protecting… We don’t know how an unguarded word might pierce a heart, or how a simple smile might be the shield that gets someone through one more day.  Guard your words, smile generously, and listen for whispers of grace.

Oh, Robin, our Robin….how many of us would gladly give up some of the smiles you gave us, if only they could have reflected enough light into your darkness to draw you safely through.

If someone makes you laugh, especially through self-deprecating humor or satire, make the effort to listen more closely.  There may come a day when you need to remind them that they are loved for more than their ability to make others smile.  If there’s a friend who always reaches out to comfort the hurting or defend the downtrodden, make the effort to watch more closely.  There may come a day when they need a hero, and that hero might be you.

Favorites:  Patch Adams, Mrs. Doubtfire, Jakob the Liar, Final Cut, Mork & Mindy, Man of the Year, Hook, Dead Poet’s Society, Bicentennial Man